In Montana, on the top of a mountain at Feather Piped Ranch in Helena, MT. I meditated with this tree for an hour. She told me her stories of the wind. She sang to me. She comforted me. I wept. She rooted down, not bound by my chronos time. We had all the time we needed, but, during this rare experience, time was irrelevant. I stopped crying eventually and just sat there in the silence of the forest.
A Mindful Moment
Certain moments are more important, more influential than others. This was one of those moments. Grief does not follow our chronos time, our linear understanding of time. The tree could have held my grief for as long as I needed— grief welling up and spilling over. I cried all the grief I had held in, and never expressed throughout my entire lifetime because, “It’s not the right time,” or “I’m supposed to be happy,” or “There is no time for this now,” or “I do not want the children/parents/friends/
Nature as the Witness
However, the tree doesn’t follow the tick tock of my time. She will stand for decades in the stillness of this forest. She is unmoved by the commotion or lack of commotion around her. People, and animals, and snow, and sunshine come and go, passing around her presence like the slow blink of an eyelid. For me, in a powerful moment, we met and time stood still. I joined her in her time. She held the time for me.
Chronos and Kairos
While chronos time feels measured, limited and fleeting, kairos time is the time of the Soul.
In the Bible, kairos time is referred to as God’s time. Kairos time is vital time. It is the time when God interrupts your routine and touches you so deeply that you are forever changed. Grief follows God’s time.
Open for Healing
I pray for you to carve out moments when time stands still. Make the space for trees, for the wind, for the tears, and for the grace of God to stop time for you to feel what you need to feel. Those unexpressed feelings build up and, if left unattended, can cause all kinds of problems. You were designed to heal. You are a container for light. Please, please find your way to let it in. The world needs people who can let the light in.
If you need help, I am here. Please reach out. 228-365-3191
“Grief is not a problem to be solved, not a condition to be medicated, but a deep encounter with an essential experience of being human. Grief becomes problematic when the conditions needed to help us work with grief are absent. For example, when we are forced to carry our sorrow in isolation, or when the time needed to fully metabolize the nutrients of a particular loss is denied, and we are pressured to return to “normal” too soon. We are told to “get on with it” and “get over it”. The lack of courtesy and compassion surrounding grief is astonishing, reflecting an underlying fear and mistrust of this basic human experience. We must find the courage once again, to walk its wild edge. “
-Francis Weller, The Wild Edge of Sorrow
*This is an excellent resource if you are grieving.